Do You Live Your Values?

By living your values, and leading from the front, you are building a stronger team, and a stronger culture. By sharing your values, you are creating highly effective leaders.

What do you value, and how do you think? Everybody has values, and everybody has a way of thinking. Being part of a team of people were each team member thinks differently, and has different values would be a very hard team to build.

For example, a highly effective leader thinks very differently to a low performing leader. They also have very different results because of what they value.


So, in order to build this kind of team, it takes discipline, sacrifice, responsibility, and engagement. A highly effective leader will definitely have value these traits. However, a low performing leader definitely won’t.

1. Working With Difficult Teams

I’ve met and worked with a lot of people who were part of difficult teams, but they did not have the discipline, they did not make the sacrifices, they did not take the responsibility, and they did not engage enough to help make their team better. The reason for this was because they did not share these values.

I have also met and worked with people who were part of difficult teams, and they did have the discipline, they did make the sacrifices, they did take on the responsibility, and they did engage enough to make the team better.

In which they eventually did help their team improve. I was part of some of these teams too. We have discussed previously that to make something happen then we must be willing to work on ourselves every day, and help others at the same time. That is the price we must pay.

We must pay the price and have the courage to increase our influence with our team if we want to see it improve, and achieve better results.

2. Having The Respect Of Our Team

For our influence to increase within our team every day, then we must have the respect of our teammates. People who demand respect have false influence, and they are usually the boss.

Teams will respect the position of the boss, but they will never respect the person if they demand respect. People who earn respect will be able to increase their influence authentically, and their team will them as a person.

We hear leaders talking a lot about culture, and how we need to change it. What we value, how we behave, and how we feel to be part of the team is what culture is.

3. Changing The Culture

So, to change the culture, firstly we need to know what each team member values, how those values are making them behave, and we need to learn how they feel at this present moment in time.

Why do we need to know these things? Because to change the culture, we need to change the values of the team, so that we can change the behaviour of the team, and then help our teammates to feel differently about being part of the team.

To be a highly effective leader we need to live and breathe the values that a highly effective leader believes in. We need to set the example and model those values and behaviours every day.

As this is the only way we can influence our teammates to change their values, and adopt the same as ourselves. We cannot force them to change their values, it all comes down to our ability to influence, and how we set the example.

When it comes to determining your future, and what your vision is for your career, and your life, it starts with how you think. What you value in your life produces your thoughts, and then how you feel because of your thoughts.

From your thoughts, you then decide what you are going to do, or what action you are going to take. From the action you then take will determine what results you produce. From the results you have produced will lead to the circumstances you are currently living in.

I talk a lot about working on ourselves every single day to become highly effective leaders, and to continually grow. If you don’t value working on yourself every day, then you will not become a highly effective leader, and you will not continually grow each day.

If you do value working on yourself every day, then you will think about working on yourself every day too. What you value is the beginning of all of your thoughts, produces your first thoughts of the day, and all of your thoughts throughout the day.

4. How To Become A Highly Effective Leader

So, to become a highly effective leader, you must share the values of a highly effective leader, which will then fuel your thoughts of becoming a highly effective leader.

Whatever thoughts you have will then determine how you feel. If you currently don’t feel like a highly effective leader, it is because you are not thinking like a highly effective leader.

Your feelings influence what decisions you make and what action you take. If you want to start feeling like a highly effective leader, then you need to change your thoughts, and think like a highly effective leader thinks. When you start thinking differently, you will feel differently.

How you feel will then influence what decisions you make, and what action you take. We can all be influenced by different people. So what we are thinking, and how we are feeling can be influenced by different people too.

If we are influenced to think and feel negatively, then we may be influenced to act in a negative manner. If we are influenced to think and feel positively, then it is highly likely that we will act positively because that will make us feel good.

The results we produce will come from the action we have taken. If we act in a negative manner, then we will produce negative results. If we act in a positive manner, then we will produce positive results.

Whatever decision we make will determine what action we take. So, if we want to produce good positive results, then we must make good and positive decisions.

Our current circumstances have come from the results we have produced throughout your life and career. If we are not happy with your current circumstances then we must go back to the beginning and change what we value.

The root cause of our circumstances have come from what we value. A highly effective leader knows this, and to help others change their circumstances, they must first help to influence them to change what they value.

Ultimately, it should be the leader of the team to influence the team members to change their values, and change their behaviours. But, if the leader is not capable, and isn’t a highly effective leader, then someone else will have to do it.

Otherwise, nobody will do it, and the team will not be a team at all. They will be a group of individuals, all with different values.

What usually happens with a group of individuals with different values is, they have to follow certain rules to keep everyone in line. For example, what time they start work, who does certain tasks, when they do those tasks, and then what time they finish.

If everybody shared values, and were striving towards the same vision and goal, then there would be no need for rules.


If the leader of the team is weak, then a highly effective team player will put their hand up to take over. A highly effective leader will talk to each team member individually to find out what their values are.

If everyone has different values, then the highly effective leader will share their vision and values with the team, and influence them to adopt the same vision and values.

Leading by example, and showing the team the way is how they influence the team. Are you willing to take over from a weak leader, share your values, and lead from the front as a highly effective leader?

What is it you aspire to be? Do you aspire to become a highly effective leader? It’s easy to aspire, it’s very hard to achieve.

I welcome hearing how this post has influenced the way you think, the way you lead, or the results you have achieved because of what you’ve learned in it. Please feel free to share your thoughts with me by commenting below.

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All the best,

Tom (Lead, Grow, Influence)

14 thoughts on “Do You Live Your Values?

  1. Tom this post speaks volumes! It is so true that it all comes from what we Value! Learning to re-wire and re-fire that brain doesn’t come easy at first. But in time you learn to weed out the negative thoughts and actions and strive for what we all value as individuals. I always say to my kids, being negative will get you nowhere, but being positive will take you anywhere!
    Love this post

    1. Hi Cherise,

      Thank you for your comment.

      I am so happy that you found the post valuable and I love that you understand what it means to really value something, and live by that value.

      Keep teaching your kids the difference between positivity and negativity, you are shaping them to lead good lives. Maybe even become future leaders themselves.

      Thanks again and all the best,


  2. These are some great points. Values give us a direction and guide to follow and live by. We also need to be accountable for those values. Don’t say one thing and do another. What you think is what you will feel (this is something I can attest to) so you need to let those negative thoughts go. To be effective, a leader needs to live by their own values and let go of their negative thoughts. Then they can be an example for others. Thanks for the post!

    1. Hey Justin,

      Thanks for your comment, and I am really pleased that you found the post valuable.

      You are so right, leaders need to live by their own values and do their best to reduce the negativity. If you want to lead by example, then you need to work on yourself first before you can help others and show them the way. Make sure that the values you say you are going to live by, that you actually live by them.

      Keep living by your values, and you will show others the way.

      Keep up the great work, and all the best.


  3. Dear Sir,

    Loved your post. You spoke directly to my heart. I totaly aggree with everything that is written. Sometimes in life it is really difficult to keep positive thinking but it is the only way . Good writing easy to read.
    In Greece we have this philosophy: Be careful what you are thinking beacause universe is listenning. Any thoughts positive or negative can come true.

    1. Hi Dimitra,

      Thank you for your comment. I am honored that I spoke to your heart.

      I love that in Greece you have that saying because it is so true. I like most people all over the world wrestle with thoughts every day. Most of the time my positive thoughts win, but sometimes my negative thoughts can get the best of me, and they sometimes come true.

      I am a lot better at remaining positive these days, and that is why I want to help others to do the same.

      Keep up your positivity, and all the best to you.


  4. Hi Tom, thanks for your article, as always I have found it edifying and interesting. I think some people are afraid of being in a position of leadership because they think they need to lead like others. I believe that anybody can lead, but there needs to be the will to do it. Applying the things you have mentioned in the article such as living and passing values make good decisions etc. are applicable by anyone who is willing to go for it and pay the price. Thanks for your advice and guidelines.
    Wish you the best.

    1. Hi Andy,

      Thank you for your comment.

      You are right. Everybody has the capacity to lead, but you have to be willing and want to lead. I know many people who took leadership positions because they were forced to, and they didn’t do a good job because they didn’t want to be there. They didn’t value leading people, and helping people.

      Paying the price and making the sacrifices is what a highly effective leader does, and does it for their people.

      Really pleased you found the post valuable. Keep returning and engaging.

      All the best,


  5. Hi Tom
    Really enjoyed reading this post and I agree with a lot of what you say. I think respect is required massively in any working environment, If they respect you as a leader then they will adopt the same values as you.
    Respect, honesty, integrity, Ive worked in environements where my colleague and I haven’t respected our leader and it affects the whole dynamic of the team/business. Easy to read, engaging and relatable post 🙂



    1. Hi Lucy,

      Thank you for your comment.

      I know how it feels not to respect your leader, I have had leaders who nobody respected unfortunately. But, I am glad I experienced it because I can learn from their mistakes.

      I also know how it feels not to be respected as a leader, and it takes a lot of hard work to turn that around.

      Really pleased you found the post valuable. Keep returning for future posts and keep engaging.

      All the best,


  6. I loved this article! Values are so important and they really do guide the way we live our lives. A crucial piece of your post was how much you emphasized that we can change, we first change our thoughts which lead to more purposeful actions.
    It reminds me of a saying my mom had on the fridge growing up “Act the way you want to be and you’ll be the way you act.” Sometimes we just have to start, change one decision and action at a time and you’ll change your life (and by consequence the lives of those around you!)

    1. Hi Heidi,

      Thank you for your comment. A comment that really inspires me and hopefully others too.

      Making one change at a time, tiny steps is definitely how to do it. It’s like Simon Sinek says, “If you go to the gym for one day for 9 hours, you will not get into shape. If you go for 20 mins every day, you will 100% get into shape, I just don’t know when.”

      We know that if we make small changes every day, our life will change for the better, and our leadership will improve. We just don’t know when, but it is 100% guaranteed.

      Thanks again for your comment.

      All the best,


  7. I resonate with the points you make in this article. We lead by example. And build a strong and effective team by living our values and creating a positive culture.

    I used to run a business with a partner. He would always arrive late at work. Over time, our staff started to arrive later and later, too. And there was no way to encourage them to be on time for work. After all, one of the bosses is always late too. Over time, I left the agency. And last I heard, they closed down soon after.

    In a class I taught, I discussed about crisis communication with social media. And the case study was about someone leaving a racist comment on a Facebook business page post. One student felt that there was no need to engage with the person who left the comment. Then I asked – what message would that send to other fans? What kind of value would that convey to the fans? Shouldn’t the business step in and set the record straight that racism is not one of their values, and they do not condone such comments?

    It is not easy to live our values. But we must. Before others create a perception of our values for us. And it may not be the ones we like to have. Or are our true values.

    1. Hi Timotheus,

      Thank you so much for your comment, and thank you for opening up about your journey so far.

      What classes do you teach? You were absolutely right to challenge your student. If you do not challenge racism when you are being attacked then it gives the impression that you don’t care, even if you do. Well done for raising that issue. That is how you are living your values, I love it.

      Having a leader who doesn’t turn up on time is poor. It is setting the example to your people that they can come in late too, and that is what happened to you. It’s unfortunate but well done again in leaving because you value being on time and leading by example in a positive way.

      Really pleased you found the post valuable. Keep coming back and engaging.

      All the best,


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